Because we believe in the field of behavior that all humans, we all go through this similar model. So sometimes it's referred to as the phases of acting out behavior, sometimes it's referred to as the cycle of crisis, and what's important is to note how your child acts. And looks like in each of these situations. And where can we de-escalate the situation pretty early? Because unfortunately, all of us, I think have probably had our kids up here at peak behavior which is physical aggression, running out of the house, maybe, uh, using profanity, really some harsh behaviors. Some unsafe behaviors, but we don't want to get to that point. So what can we do in these phases before to de-escalate the situation, which is super, super crucial, so we don't get here. Because what happens is, the key point to remember here with this visual is so many times when it gets to the peak behavior, that's when we have to provide attention, right? We have to keep our child safe. We have to redirect them. So they're getting all This possible reinforcement and what happens over time is that kids learn, hey, guess what? I just, all I have to do is hit my mom, or all I have to do is call my dad this horrible name, and then I'm gonna get this reaction that I want. Then I'm gonna get out of doing the chore. Then I'm going to, but if we notice these precursor behaviors, these things that are happening ahead of time, hopefully, we can stop it there so they're not jumping right to the big behavior that we don't wanna see. All right, so let's talk about de-escalation. So this comes from, and I'm sharing these resources too so that you guys can look these things up too. That book is a great resource, Crisis Prevention Institute, CPI, um, you can follow them on Facebook or Instagram and get some great behavior tips just like this. So some of the most common de-escalation. And strategies again that we try to help teachers grasp and we're sharing this with you or be empathetic, respecting personal space, allow time for decisions. I'm not gonna focus on all of these but um set limits, choose wisely, pick your battles, what you insist upon, allow silence for reflection. And what I wanna talk to you in the next few minutes is keep our emotional brains in check because it is very difficult and this is where we struggle, and especially as parents, this is where we struggle to, when we see our kids having some behavioral challenges. Many times it's hard for us to really think rationally, be objective, because that's your child. So it's natural that it's, it's difficult to do this, but we wanna really focus on in these situations when they're going through this acting out cycle, how can we keep our emotional brain in check. So another resource, a great book called Flooded. It's a brain-based guide um for to help children regulate their emotions. Um, and this is a very easy read with really great tips about how people respond to stressful events. So if, again, we're looking at the ABCs, there's a trigger, how is our child responding to that and what happens with the brain? What happens in that situation? Because when we look at what happens in the brain, we understand a lot more and we can look at it more objectively and not think, oh, my kid's just, you know, being a knucklehead or my kid's just doing this because he wants to get out of this. We really look at what's happening. So I'm gonna read this quote to you because I think it's really powerful and impactful. This comes from the book. If we aren't careful, we get caught up in the flooded reactions of others and become flooded ourselves. Two flooded people interacting with each other never ends well. Even worse, when adults and children both end up flooded, the adult makes decisions they regret, and I have certainly made many, many decisions as a parent that I regretted, and I've apologized to my kids and, you know, I'm guilty of it. It's not easy. So I think that's just a powerful statement as a reminder that when our kids are escalating, we have to do whatever we can to remain calm and try not to escalate ourselves. And another quote from the book, which I thought was great, is from the head coach, which I'm not quite certain, I probably should have looked this up if he's still the head coach of the Boston Celtics, but at the time, he was quoted as saying, Make the next right play. So when we're talking about de-escalating situations, try to make the next best move. Just think about it in that moment, what is gonna be my next best move? Because you can't think about 2 hours later. You can't think about 5 hours later when you're trying to de-escalate a student or a child who's really starting to escalate. So I really think that's a great resource if you're able to get your hands on it. Um, it's again, very quick read but great um tips in there. My last resource that I know I'm bringing a lot out out at you, but uh, Professional Crisis Management Association. So, um, a lot of you have probably heard of PCM that's the crisis management system that we use in Borrow County schools, but the bulk of PCM, the the majority of the training is about de-escalating situations and teaching kids replacement skills. So if you wanna follow them, PCMA on Facebook or Instagram, they come out with these Quick tips, and they're fabulous, and they do it frequently. And a lot of times it might say, quick tip for teacher, but behavior is behavior. It, it applies to all of us as parents too. And we're teachers. Parents are teachers too, right? So, when you're in a situation and your child is starting to escalate, maybe you, you do these self-talk tricks. So name it to tame it. So maybe you say out loud, I'm getting upset. I'm getting frustrated right now. It may not be appropriate, that might actually make it worse for your child, but maybe it'll help you. Maybe you just whisper it. Use a power phrase. That's like a positive affirmation for yourself. I can make it through this. This is not gonna last forever. I'm gonna make it through. Talk like a coach, not a critic. Don't criticize yourself. We're, we beat ourselves all the time about I should have done this, I could do this. Why did this happen? Coach yourself along, be positive. I can make it through. Say what you'll do next. So maybe your, your child is really, really starting to escalate and you say, OK, I'm gonna walk over here and you say it out loud, so there's power in your statement and that actually makes you do it. That actually makes you engage in the behavior and then end with a win. Look at what you did right. Point out to yourself, OK, you know what? I didn't scream today. I didn't. You know, run out of the house today. I actually was able to stay in this situation, whatever it might be, um, really end with a win. These are some examples of some coping strategies that you might already do, but again, with these name, these uh self-talk tricks and our own coping strategies, we need to practice them ourselves. If you're my age or older, We weren't taught coping strategies in school. We weren't taught coping strategies at home, probably. I wasn't. I was taught to just smile and be happy all the time. What do you, why are you upset? We need to practice this ourselves, and we need to do it when we're calm, when we're away from our kids. So practice these things. The more practice you do, the better you'll be able to do it on the spot when it's needed. So all of these things are some, some good ideas of how you can practice. And, and this is a reminder that using behavior incidents as a teachable moment, it's OK for our kids to see that we're frustrated. It's OK for them to see that their behavior affects us too, because that's a natural consequence. A lot of times kids, and again, it's developmentally appropriate. Behavior or phase to to not really take others' perspective into account when they're exhibiting these behaviors. Sometimes as as adults, we do the same thing. We're very self-centered and we don't see how our behavior is affecting other people, but it's OK, it's OK to sit down. And just say I'm exhausted. This is, this is really hard for me. It upsets me, it makes my heart sad when you're doing this. So it's OK to have those teachable moments so they understand how their behavior is affecting other people. And then debrief. This is the last piece of it, but try to debrief in your own mind. Maybe you write it down. If you can take data on these incidents, you are a champion, you're amazing, you're, you're great. I was never good at that, but maybe see what was the trigger today? What happened today? They've really set my child off and what maybe are there setting events? Is there a medication change? Are things different in the house? It does, listen, it's the beginning of a school year. That is a setting event, OK? Beginning of a school year, new teachers, new school, new classes, all of that stuff, that's a setting event. So our kids can certainly be put off by that. What could you do differently next time? So maybe could you have intervened earlier? Maybe your tone of voice, maybe your facial expression. I have the worst, I can't hide anything on my face. So I really need to be mindful of how I look at my children and my tone of voice. Could I Offered choices or given space. And what did you do, do well? Remember that self-talk stuff end with a win. Reinforce yourself, OK? And reinforce yourself every time because we need to help ourselves do better and the only way we do better is if we give ourselves some praise. And I'm gonna end it with a very important reminder to give yourself some grace. It is so difficult to do, implement the right behavior strategies, do it all the time, do it with Fidelity, always be on point. We're humans too, and we mess up all the time. So give yourself some grace, just try to do a bit, little bit better each and every time. So I wish you well. I hope all your kids have a wonderful school year. I hope you look up some of those resources because they're really great behavior tip reminders. So, thank you so much for letting me share. Lauren, that was excellent, and I can tell that everyone was res it was resonating because I saw applause, I saw hearts, um, I saw thumbs up, so great job. Thank you so very much. Awesome. OK, parents, so we're going to move on into the next aspect of our um agenda for this afternoon. And this is where we highlight our community partner. And so this year we are very, very excited um to bring to you the friendship circle of greater Fort Lauderdale. So I want to, um, Natalie, I want to introduce you to Natalie Gutman, who is the outreach director with Friendship Circle. Natalie, are you there? I'm not hearing her. Natalie, are you present with us? I think Natalie is present. OK. Um, but, um, maybe she's having some difficulties. OK, so we'll give her a few moments. So parents. Give us a little grace while Natalie is able to connect her microphone. Let me see if she's putting anything in the chat. I don't see anything just yet. Now, Natalie, let us know when you're ready. And parents in the meanwhile, um, the link for the parent survey was placed in the chat as well as the schedule of our meetings for this year, and if you are unable to open them, don't worry, we will definitely send them out to you via parent link. So just bear with us until we can get to our community partner. I don't see anything just yet. So parents, I'm gonna ask you to give us a couple of minutes. Let me check. Excuse Yes, go ahead. Is there a way to get a copy of the recording? I jumped on late um from another meeting and I'm wondering if there's a way that we would be able to see the recording of this uh lunch and learn. I will, you know what, our recording started a little bit late into the session, however, I will be able to share that in the parent link as well. The link that you can go to see it. No problem. We're just holding now for our community partners, so thank you for bearing with us. I'm I'm double checking. Can you confirm the last speaker? I really wanna make sure I understand her name. The last speaker was Lauren Dieterson. D I D R I K S E N. Perfect, thank you. And parents, just so you know, thank you for your patience. We're just trying to reach out to, we believe there are technology issues with our community partners, so thank you for holding on. May I ask another question not related to this before you ask the question, parents, let me let you know that our community partner is entering the room, so thank you and hang in there and thank you for your patience. Hello, hello, hello. We're able to hear you, Natalie. Welcome. Perfect. So I'm having technical difficulties here. Um, first of all, it's so nice to meet all of you. Thank you so much for giving me this opportunity to present. Um, my name is Muhammed Natalie Gutman. I'm the outreach director over at Friendship Circle. Friendship Circle is a unique program that provides children, teens and adults in our community with disabilities, both social programs and life skills and job training programs. Um, what I'd like to first do is show you a quick clip. And I might need help sharing the screen. Hold on 1 2nd. I'm going to Sure, let me I don't, we can see your screen. You can see my screen? Yes. OK, perfect. Thank you so much. It's like I can't hear anyone and I can't see anyone, so I, I'm uh I'm all for open engagement. So here's a little bit about our program, um, I just hope you can hear it as well. Bear with me. We're not able to hear. If you're not able to hear it. No. So Natalie, what you have to do is stop sharing, and when you go to share again, make sure you at the top, toggle the sound on. OK, so, so take it down first. Yeah. Now, try to reshare again and at the very top, you'll see where you can include sharing your sound. Share includes sound. Check that out. This is why I need to do these things when my teenagers are at home. OK, here we go again. Found it perfect. Perfect. Thank you so much. There is an incredible gift that we all have in our lives that we take for granted and that is the gift of friendship that is really the pinpoint of what we try to do at Friendship Circle that every child, no matter who they are, every adult no matter who they are, has. The amazing gift of friends by the time they walk out the doors, whether it's teen scene young adult circle culinary club friends at home, mom's night out, this is something they truly take home with them this incredible gift of friendship. I really enjoy the friend circle. We do projects, we have parties, games, we have good time out there. They have friends, they love each other. They do yoga, they do dance. Friendship circles impacted my life and my family just by giving my son an outlet. He has a group of people that he belongs with and he feels like he's found his tribe. A really positive change for for Blake and for our family. I get a lot of fulfillment from all of my friends. They're my friends, OK? They're not children, they're my friends. We realized when we first started that there is a large sector of the community that we're forgotten about and not included within the rest there's a real need out there and we built the life skills and job training program. It was right then and there we opened the friendship grill so that our young adults with special needs get the opportunity more than just a typical program to actually practice. Life skills and job training skills get to interact with customers get to run the cash register get to take inventory get to clean, learn what it means to obtain a job. The students are able to work in the cafe. For my son, it gives him a sense of pride that he's able to work in a real kitchen. They learn how to navigate through life as adults. They clean the windows. They arrange the tables. Our dream is that they walk out with a sense of purpose and a sense of pride in who they are and realizing that they too have something to offer the community around them and by the time our adults graduate and obtain all the skills needed, they're able to get great jobs and be able to show the world around them what they too can contribute. When I was not a member of this program, I felt lonely, almost always. I felt like I had no purpose, I felt like I had no drive. I had no reason to exist. This program means that much to me. It's just provides the best possible environment for our students to learn and grow. This program makes my life better because I'm Make friends. Every morning when I come in I feel excited and proud and happy. I wanna tell all the volunteers thank you and everything that you do. Seeing how their lives are changed, seeing the huge impact it has on them is worth everything. So that is a very broad overview of our programs and I'm gonna go into each one of our programs. So when Friendship Circle was started, um, it was based on social programs. It was the director herself and two families in the community, um, with children with special needs who were excluded from everything going on in the community and so it started as a once a month program. And over the last 10 years, what started as a once in a month program has now evolved into 70 programs annually on top of our Monday through Friday life skills and job training program. I want to start with our culinary club program. Our programming starts. Our social program starts at age 6 years old. Our culinary club is our flagship incredible program. All of our social programs are based on a 1 to 1 ratio. We have 1 participant to 1 volunteer, which means all of the amazing students that you see in your schools that are really community leaders are spending. their Sundays volunteering with us at Friendship Circle and it's amazing to see when we ask for parent feedback this year what our parents are saying that uh that their kids um or their guardians have gotten from the program and 100% of them said our volunteers they have friends so I wanna open up with our culinary club program forgive me that it's on Instagram, um, hopefully you can see it. Um Includes sound. The sound that they can see in here. It's not in there You can hear it. So our culinary program happens once a month on Sundays. Uh, the program runs from 3 to 4:30. Our calendar is up on the website. I'm gonna go ahead and drop our website in here, um, so you can see everything we have going on at Friendship Circle. Um, our, our next cul club is gonna be the 21st, and it's amazing when we started culinary Club about 4 years ago we had about 15 people coming in. We have almost 100 participants that come in once a month as. Part of culinary club and I can tell you that families that come into Friendship Circle, we have a restaurant down on Las Olas Boulevard which is our life skills and job training job site, um, which is open to the public. So if anyone is in the downtown Fort Lauderdale area, Friendship Grill is always open, happy to serve, um, and our participants are actually part of our staff in their learning and training, greeting customers every day and when people come in and they see what we have going on and they. To ask questions because in the restaurant we do have slides and positive affirmations on the walls and you know our events on a TV screen and there and you know the questions start to to happen of oh well I know someone or my neighbor has a child, you know, is this a place I can come and uh we did a workshop last year with the local law enforcement agency who came in for a rock painting event and one of the detectives came over to me afterwards and said, Can I ask you a question? I have a six year old son who's autistic, and nobody understands what we're going through. We don't go to church anymore on Sundays. My kid tantrums, I, I see you do something for adults, you know, as part of the life skills program. Do you have something else? And I told him about our club. And 6 months later, I ran into him at an event, and he came over to me and he gave me a hug, and he said to me, I want you to know you've changed my life. I walk into a room once a month with a group of parents that see me and understand what I'm going through. And so it's It's Amazing to be part of this and to see that, you know, our team volunteers are not teams that are coming in to get their community service hours signed off because those teams we have found year after year, those are the teams that drop off in January, those aren't the friendship circle teams that are getting involved. The club for six year olds is culinary Club. It's once a month. We also have twice a year on mom's night out because we know how hard our moms are working and our dads. I'm working on getting a dad's night out, looking for funding for that. Um, but, uh, we do a mom's night out twice a year as well. The next program is our teen scene. Our teen scene starts at age 10, and I'm gonna give you guys a small glimpse of this now that I've gotten proficient. I hope at this share screen. OK. So Vicky, that's a great question. Um, I'm gonna drop my email in here as well. So I was really prepared, but we're a little earlier than I thought we were gonna be, um, outreach director at Friendship FL.org. The cost of the programs is $220 for the year for either our young adult program, which takes place on Thursday evenings. That's for ages 20 and up. Our teen scene takes place twice a month on Sundays, and our culinary club is once a month on Sundays. The $220 covers two programs a month. It's not close to what the cost is. We've we also offer scholarships for families. Um, what we found is two things. When we didn't charge for programs, families would come and not RSVP. And on the flip side, people would RSVP and not come, and it's really hard to run a successful. Program to have the right amount of supplies, the right amount of volunteers, you know, parents would come with participants and we thought there was 10 people coming, and we only had 10 volunteers, but it turns out 35 people came. And so we found by charging costs for the program and and we do offer scholarships for families in need, it, it kind of makes people accountable to to. To come and that's really um important when planning things events because we want it to be successful we want everyone to have a good time um and you know we're talking about it comes down to $8 or $9 a program which obviously is not covering the cost um there are not limitations for wheelchair bound kids um as far as our social programs there's a ramp to come in. To the building and we have uh a bathroom that's wheelchair accessible um but Alison if you have specific questions feel free to email me directly I dropped my information in there um the next program we started this year was a combination from our life skills and job training program because we know that there are students that are aging out of the school system that have not yet gotten, uh, have gotten their diplomas and maybe. M I L A M I I yes. Hello? I can't hear you. Keep going, you can go ahead. OK, um, that there's a lot of adults in our community that are being left out. Maybe they're doing a job two days a week and therefore a life skills and job training program is not something for them. Part of our life skills and job training program, we have an amazing program on Fridays called the Harmonicas music. And so what we try to do is open up the music program to everyone in the community that can benefit from it. This is a free program every single Friday that takes place at our facility. Yes, you have to register for the program. No, there's no cost associated with it. Um, really positive to make an effort to cost when you have two programs a month. Yeah, no, I'm, I'm happy to, to help everyone and if you have uh. Uh-huh. Give me a second. I want to share a little bit of our music program because it's absolutely incredible. You should know a lot of our staff over at our life skills program is volunteers. Um, some of the leaders in our music program are actually doctors in our community that, yes, the music program, so our music program is for adults we kind of. Towards the 17 and up. However, as part of our teen scene program and our young adult program, we also incorporate a karaoke night, a music night, um, but the one that takes place on Friday is during the life skills and job training program. So that one we kind of keep it in the adult age range. Let me give you a brief glimpse of this program. Let me turn that off. Um, so our music program is something we started last year as we had already had it incorporated as part of our life skills program, and we wanted to make it more accessible to people in the community. Um, this year we have also opened up the Friendship Art Gallery during the day for adults, um, that also is in conjunction with our life skills and job training program. We have an incredible art gallery on La Solas Boulevard where our students get to go into that space, be creative, work with world renowned artists, um, creating some of the most incredible things. A lot of the art is being student led. Recently we had an artist come in and donate this unbelievable clock that they made. And one of our students, um, came in to do art and pointed to the art teacher, and he said, the clock's broken. And every art session afterwards, he said the the clock's broken, fixed clock. And that turns into a 10 week art workshop for our life skills program where they created working clocks um out of resin and got to do the mechanics of it and and it's one of the most incredible things when you see it in the art gallery hanging on the wall where our students. They are proud that their stuff is featured in an art gallery. They are proud that they are staff at the Friendship Grill, that they come in every morning, that they are doing their job training. Part of our life skills and job training program is a business ambassador program. Uh, we bring in mentors from the community, business professionals to come in and meet with our students, and then we take them on visits to different facilities and thank God so many of them have led to future jobs for our students. So if any of you are out there in the business world and would be interested in getting involved, maybe as a mentor, have a business that you'd like to open that our students can come into to, you know, in our restaurant they're learning certain skills, but in the restaurant down the block they're learning other skills. Um, going into the Coral Springs Ice then, we went with them on a field trip recently, and it was amazing how many different skills they could practice between organizing the skates, sharpening the skates, working in the skate shop, getting things set up for the concession stand, and practicing those skills. But it takes opportunities from people who really live in our community to understand that there's not a limitation on what everyone can do when everyone's willing to work together. And Really fine tune what the individual needs in order to be successful. Um, the last program I'm gonna share for today is our Young Adult circle. We are also kicking off a cheerleading program this year, so forgive me, I don't have videos on cheerleading. It's gonna be on Monday, but, um, definitely reach out to me and I will, um, put you on our mailing list. Let me know the age of your child, um, and I'm happy to answer any questions you might have. Let me show you our last program over here. Um, I'm happy to answer any questions, anyone I have about our programs, um, our teams and our young adult circle programs mimic each other, um, on Thursdays and Sunday nights, where we'll do it the same theme for both. We're doing a, a garden tea party this week. We do Olympic Games, spa night, hunt in the park, relay races. We did cupcake. And the idea is the second people walk in the door, they are paired with a friend. And that's really the goal of Friendship Circle because, you know, when I, when I go to speak to teens in public school and I, uh, or any of the schools for that matter, and I say, OK, you got those Taylor Swift tickets, whatever the cost was, you got 2 tickets. What's the first thing you're gonna do when you found out you got those tickets? And every single person raises their hand and tells me, I'm calling my best friends. And the truth is, in the special needs world, we know how important friendship is because that's really the basis of everything. And that's what Friendship circle is here for, to create friendships, to create positive meaningful interactions and to give everyone an opportunity to shine. And uh I didn't, I didn't come into this looking for work. In fact, they came out and found me and I was very uh determined to be a stay at home mom for the first time in a in a long time. And I walked into Friendship Circle, and it is the biggest bucket filler in my life by far. And it's an honor to work for an organization that's really um heart and soul putting in the work. We have a very small staff count to what we're doing, and the reason is because we want to make this accessible for everyone. So if anyone has any questions, feel free to unmute yourself, introduce yourself, uh, anyone who dropped their email address in here, I'm going to copy them down and reach out to you directly. And uh if there's anything else I can do for you. I hope that that was quick and within your time frame, Gwendolyn and stuff. Yes, thank you so very much. That was awesome, and you did get quite a bit of feedback in the chat. You got a lot of hearts flowing to you and so thank you, thank you so much. No problem. OK. Are there, are there any questions for Natalie? Mhm. Hello, my name is Tasha. I didn't get your email. Could you put it back online for me, please? Absolutely, and Gwendoline, if everyone who's registered for today's session, is it possible to just email out my contact information? Um, parents don't register for it, but we're going to be sending them. a link for this session, so um you can send, yeah, we could include that in the email so you can just email it to me. OK, no problem, and I'll also include the flyers with our calendar and our times and all of that. Sure, absolutely. I'll be happy to send it out for you. Amazing. When the friendship circle does a great job of tagging Broward ESC on Instagram, and we're always reposting their things too. So if you're following us on Instagram, you'll also see a lot of the Friendship circle. Awesome. Thank you for that, Stephanie. Thank you so much. OK, question. Sure, go right ahead. Um, so I think this is great. I've, I've never heard of you, or maybe I haven't, I've forgotten, but I have, um, two kids with special needs that my older two kids, and then my younger two kids do not have special needs. Do you offer anything where the younger two can either join the older two, or, or, you know what I mean, because as like my family, so, so, so I totally understand we have a few families in this boat. How old are your older two and how old are your younger two? The older two are 18 and the younger 21 is 9, and the other one's 8. We do Special Olympics every once in a while, and they've just aged into being able to be a volunteer. So while they're performing their sport, the younger two can be supervised and volunteer somewhere. So that's why I was like trying to figure out if there's something along those lines. So if you're younger too, and, and it really like I really kind of leave this discretion up to the parents and that I have a very capable 9 year old who loves to come to culinary club and volunteer. Now he's, he has a hard time working with the participants, so I'll give him a task, um. I'm happy if they want to come to Culinary Club, um, and try it out and see, because we do have some, if they would be interested in maybe being paired up with someone or helping or put supplies on the table, I certainly wouldn't kick them out. For Young Adult Circle, um, or Teen scene. They might feel a little left out, right. Definitely for culinary club that would work. Awesome, thank you. No problem. Hey, thank you. um, so Natalie, we wanna really thank you for coming in as our partner and sharing the wonderful things that are going on at the Friendship Circle and so parents, this completes our lunch and learn for this month, but please stay tuned because you will be getting additional information for the next meeting, which is Wednesday, October 1st. So please plan to be with us, we'd love to have you and so I am going to. Wish you a great day and have you return to